The words that all should fear when said by me...

I've been thinking.

Lol.

Seriously I have, about faith and religion... and for some reason I barely feel any connection to Selene anymore. I feel towards her the same way I feel regarding the other gods, sort of respectful yet distant. I don't feel sad so maybe my time with her is coming to an end. Who knows?

I don't feel anything towards any other deity so perhaps I'm not destined to be tied to one specific god after all. I still feel pagan, on some base level, but there is nothing definite, god-wise, pushing me in any particular direction.

For some reason I keep encountering articles and sites regarding the Amish. I have to admit I've long been fascinated by them and their culture. Not that I agree with everything they believe in, they are conservative Christians after all, but there is just "something" that appeals to me, deep within my psyche somewhere. Whether it's the simple way of life, the growing and providing for themselves or even the living one step removed from the modern world, I have no idea. One thing I do know is that I envy them the peace and tranquillity they appear to have and whenever I see a program about them they seem to have an air of contentment I would love to have (more often than I do anyway).

I don't know... I guess it's something that will work itself out in good time. I doubt I could rush finding out about whether my connection to Selene is fading, even if I wanted to. I wonder if I ever had one to begin with, or if I just convinced myself because it was something I desperately wanted at the time? I really have no idea. Maybe I'm entering one of my "agnostic phases". I've had them in the past and no doubt I'll have them again in the future.

I should stop typing now as I'm tired and I'll only start thinking about things more deeply than I should at 2.22am hahaha!