Showing posts with label disappointed. Show all posts
Showing posts with label disappointed. Show all posts
Tuesday, 23 October 2012
Hospitals are such depressing places...
... and when the person you're visiting is a depressing person the experience is doubly soul destroying :o(
My Nan has suffered from two small and one medium stroke and has been in hospital for three weeks now. She seems to be getting worse instead of better and is content to just fester in her bed without putting even minimal effort into getting better and going home (although she is very vocal about what's not going to happen!) Three different women have been discharged from her ward since she was admitted, but all she is prepared to do when asked to do anything - regardless how small - is say "I can't" without even trying *sigh*
It's sad to watch someone just give up... I know she's 89 but to see a woman formerly so robust sit in bed and wet and soil herself without caring just drains me (of energy and also patience). Demoralising isn't the word :o(
Sorry to be a bit of a downer, I just don't know what to say to her anymore to make a difference. I've been gentle, harsh, kind, cruel, sharp, cajoling, patient, impatient - and now I just don't know what to say to her. My visits involve me sitting in a chair in virtual silence once the subjects of her meals, my meals, the journey, the weather, the other people in the ward and whether anyone has phoned to ask how she is, have been discussed. She doesn't like people laughing or making jokes and is quick to scold those that do with "it's not funny" or "don't laugh" and the way it's said quickly wipes any smiles away. Luckily I'm not alone during visits as Mum and Dad are with me, sometimes my youngest uncle, too, when he get get away from work. Without them all there as well I would probably go barmy!
I just worry how all this will affect my Dad (who suffers from depression himself). In turn that makes me anxious and nervous which doesn't help my digestive system which is not strong at the best of times. Mum is suffering from stress as well and for the first time in years the eczema on her legs has flared up and it looks like her leg ulcer could be returning as well (she's desperately trying to stop that before it starts). The extra walking is beginning to hurt Dad as he suffers from dreadful arthritis (and I swear the dreadfully uncomfy chairs are responsible for my current back pain).
We used to visit every day, but there seems little point if there is no positive change. Now we go every other day so that Dad can rest himself (and most 'off' days he spends asleep as it just takes so much out of him).
All told I just feel a bit dejected at the moment.
Tuesday, 19 June 2012
HOW DARE HE!!
Just goes to show how little you know someone that you thought you'd known for years.
I shared a picture on FB... it said that for every share Facebook would donate a dollar. So I shared it. (Sorry, I know it's not nice, but I'm documenting the nasty conversation that sprang up because of it).
This isn't the first time that, Herne has come back with a reply like this... he also used to do it to my Mum as well. It just strikes me as being so condescending and like he's trying to make me look like a fool. Why I have no idea. He could have sent me a private message telling me it was a scam... I had no idea it was, why would I? I have no idea why anyone would use a child to scam people.
Then I posted this and went to bed, not waking until the people putting up the scaffolding next door woke me at just before half ten... and you can see what he said to me!
I wouldn't have minded if it had been said to me privately, and I had hoped that the years we had known each other (and all the help I'd given him in the past) would have counted towards being treated with more respect than I have been shown. Obviously I was wrong!
On checking my FB he has un-friended me. Can't say I'm sorry... in fact I was surprised that he did as I asked (people usually don't lol).
I shared a picture on FB... it said that for every share Facebook would donate a dollar. So I shared it. (Sorry, I know it's not nice, but I'm documenting the nasty conversation that sprang up because of it).
This isn't the first time that, Herne has come back with a reply like this... he also used to do it to my Mum as well. It just strikes me as being so condescending and like he's trying to make me look like a fool. Why I have no idea. He could have sent me a private message telling me it was a scam... I had no idea it was, why would I? I have no idea why anyone would use a child to scam people.
Then I posted this and went to bed, not waking until the people putting up the scaffolding next door woke me at just before half ten... and you can see what he said to me!
I wouldn't have minded if it had been said to me privately, and I had hoped that the years we had known each other (and all the help I'd given him in the past) would have counted towards being treated with more respect than I have been shown. Obviously I was wrong!
On checking my FB he has un-friended me. Can't say I'm sorry... in fact I was surprised that he did as I asked (people usually don't lol).
Friday, 28 October 2011
So... the results of my blood tests are in...
... and there is nothing wrong with me!!
I knew that the tests would come back clear. I'm really disappointed as I don't understand why I still feel so bad all the time. I still feel exhausted, even after I wake up and apparently there is no medical reason for me to feel that way. I just don't know what to do anymore.
Oh well, if nothing else it has proved that my cholesterol is normal and there is nothing seriously wrong with me. I guess I should be grateful for that, even if it still leaves a huge question mark hanging over my head as to what it could be.
I knew that the tests would come back clear. I'm really disappointed as I don't understand why I still feel so bad all the time. I still feel exhausted, even after I wake up and apparently there is no medical reason for me to feel that way. I just don't know what to do anymore.
Oh well, if nothing else it has proved that my cholesterol is normal and there is nothing seriously wrong with me. I guess I should be grateful for that, even if it still leaves a huge question mark hanging over my head as to what it could be.
Saturday, 27 August 2011
A question about the term "fluffy" in Paganism
There was a question asked, about just what "fluffy" means (at a forum I used to go to all the time, but which I rarely go to anymore as I feel as if I now longer belong there as I'm not "Pagan enough!")
I was going to reply to the thread, but upon reflection I really didn't feel comfortable enough in doing so and so I'm posting it here instead (no doubt someone would have remarked about my post not actually replying to the question of the thread, and I just cannot be bothered in people arguing with me over it). My reply:
I would have posted it there, but there would be no point, I'd either be ignored or I'd be dog-piled and have people having a go at me for saying it and I truly can't be bothered with that kind of treatment! I seemed to routinely either get ignored or treated as somehow lesser for voicing my opinion over there in the past, so I no longer bother anymore (in fact I left for the longest time and returned a few weeks ago to find most of the people that seemed to take umbrage at my mere prescence had been banned, but there are still a few left). I just don't feel as if my opinions matter so why should I post anything there?!
I can honestly say that the only things I learned there were how to look down on people for believing things that I was meant to find ridiculous and how to be very cynical and condescending regarding people that dare to say things that are frowned upon (like merry meet and blessed be).
It is being back at places like that that make me not want to be pagan at all... if I'm meant to believe some of the things that they all believe I'd rather not bother with any of it!
They are fine with people believing in whatever they want, unless they don't agree with it and then you shouldn't believe it! I truly don't give a shit anymore... if people want to worship a clown riding a yellow unicycle round and round in a circle, that is up to them and as long as they don't tell me I have to believe in it too, it's all good.
I sometimes wonder if it's places like that that help make me so confused sometimes... if enough people tell you you're wrong for thinking a certain way, eventually you start to believe them so that you feel like you belong! It reminds me of the story of The Emperor's New Clothes, where anyone that couldn't see the wonderful fabric was a fool... and as no one wanted to be thought of as a fool they went along with the charade even though the King walked the streets stark naked!
I'm not prepared to spend my time defending my opinions against people that have no right to question them, so it's better for me to just stay away from those people!!!
I was going to reply to the thread, but upon reflection I really didn't feel comfortable enough in doing so and so I'm posting it here instead (no doubt someone would have remarked about my post not actually replying to the question of the thread, and I just cannot be bothered in people arguing with me over it). My reply:
I'd be very surprised if there were any "fluffies" in the Valley, this place tends to knock that out of people very quickly! I know it did with me!
Reading the definitions of "fluffy" here made me laugh... and I fall into the "fluffy" spectrum in a good few areas (although not in my belief about angels and fairies, I don't believe in them). In regards to some of them I'm a very bad Pagan and probably should stop using the term in regards to myself as I don't appear to be Pagan enough.
Personally, I don't care how fluffy someone is, and it's taking me years to counteract the negative programming I received here towards terms like blessed be and merry meet (and subsequently my opinions of people that use them, too... when you are told enough to scorn the terms, eventually you end up scorning the people that use them as well, which is wrong!)
These days I don't care what people believe, I just care about how they treat me and others. It matters more to me. If people want to believe that all fairies are like Tinkerbell and are happy little pixies that only do good for people, who cares? Who are they hurting by believing that? No one (and if the Fae are offended by that I'm sure they are more than capable of doing something about it, not that I believe in the Fae, either).
People should have the right to believe whatever the hell they want, and none of us have any rights to tell them that they can't (or treat them as somehow lesser for holding beliefs we disagree with... that would make us elitists).
I would have posted it there, but there would be no point, I'd either be ignored or I'd be dog-piled and have people having a go at me for saying it and I truly can't be bothered with that kind of treatment! I seemed to routinely either get ignored or treated as somehow lesser for voicing my opinion over there in the past, so I no longer bother anymore (in fact I left for the longest time and returned a few weeks ago to find most of the people that seemed to take umbrage at my mere prescence had been banned, but there are still a few left). I just don't feel as if my opinions matter so why should I post anything there?!
I can honestly say that the only things I learned there were how to look down on people for believing things that I was meant to find ridiculous and how to be very cynical and condescending regarding people that dare to say things that are frowned upon (like merry meet and blessed be).
It is being back at places like that that make me not want to be pagan at all... if I'm meant to believe some of the things that they all believe I'd rather not bother with any of it!
They are fine with people believing in whatever they want, unless they don't agree with it and then you shouldn't believe it! I truly don't give a shit anymore... if people want to worship a clown riding a yellow unicycle round and round in a circle, that is up to them and as long as they don't tell me I have to believe in it too, it's all good.
I sometimes wonder if it's places like that that help make me so confused sometimes... if enough people tell you you're wrong for thinking a certain way, eventually you start to believe them so that you feel like you belong! It reminds me of the story of The Emperor's New Clothes, where anyone that couldn't see the wonderful fabric was a fool... and as no one wanted to be thought of as a fool they went along with the charade even though the King walked the streets stark naked!
I'm not prepared to spend my time defending my opinions against people that have no right to question them, so it's better for me to just stay away from those people!!!
Saturday, 21 May 2011
I'm surrounded by sex-mad people!
I'm at a dating site for big women... and all of the guys that speak to me all seem as if they just want to get their leg over and shag like rabbits! I don't want that, not at all. One guy even asked why I was on the site if I'm not interested in sex!! What kind of question is that?!?! What about friendship? What about romance? Is sex the be-all and end-all of human achievement? Is there nothing else? What am I missing here?!
I like the idea of being in a relationship, I really do, but the sex part doesn't matter to me, in any way (I also don't want kids). The thought of having sex makes me feeling sick (in fact I just shuddered at the prospect). To me there is so much more than interlocking body parts. Maybe because I'm a virgin and have never even been kissed is the reason (as I've been told I don't know what I'm missing, which is true, I don't)... maybe it's because I find my body repulsive and the thought of someone else seeing it (and the reactions it would no doubt garner) fills me with fear! I like the idea of being kissed... it's just the rest that makes me want to turn and flee in terror. Sex just seems to make things so complicated and can lead to such life changing events that I don't want (kids, disease, medical examinations, etc).
I like men, I really do, I like the thought of being in the company of a man that I find attractive... I like the thought of hugging and kissing, walking hand in hand, of looking into his eyes and feeling loved and all of the other little things that couples do together... just not the sex part! I think it would take someone incredibly special to ever change my mind, too, and I'm not sure such a man exists.
I also don't see how people could ever see me in a sexual context, I have nothing sexual about me... some people seem to exude sexiness from every pore, I don't. I can't even flirt so I don't bother as it seems to send out signals that I don't know how to deal with when things always seem to turn more serious.
I just don't understand this obsession with sex that seems to pervade every tiny facet of people's lives these days... surely there has to be more depth to people than that? If not then what the hell is wrong with me in that I don't and can't see things in the same way?!
Maybe I shouldn't bother in trying to find someone out there... if all I'm going to be is a place to rest their genitals then I'd rather be alone and stay true to myself... another reason that I'm grateful to prostitutes... they deal with the guys with one track minds so I don't have to!!
Guess I'm just a frigid prude.
I always knew I was different... now I know I am a total freak by today's (low) standards... not sure how I feel about that, being honest **shrugs**
I like the idea of being in a relationship, I really do, but the sex part doesn't matter to me, in any way (I also don't want kids). The thought of having sex makes me feeling sick (in fact I just shuddered at the prospect). To me there is so much more than interlocking body parts. Maybe because I'm a virgin and have never even been kissed is the reason (as I've been told I don't know what I'm missing, which is true, I don't)... maybe it's because I find my body repulsive and the thought of someone else seeing it (and the reactions it would no doubt garner) fills me with fear! I like the idea of being kissed... it's just the rest that makes me want to turn and flee in terror. Sex just seems to make things so complicated and can lead to such life changing events that I don't want (kids, disease, medical examinations, etc).
I like men, I really do, I like the thought of being in the company of a man that I find attractive... I like the thought of hugging and kissing, walking hand in hand, of looking into his eyes and feeling loved and all of the other little things that couples do together... just not the sex part! I think it would take someone incredibly special to ever change my mind, too, and I'm not sure such a man exists.
I also don't see how people could ever see me in a sexual context, I have nothing sexual about me... some people seem to exude sexiness from every pore, I don't. I can't even flirt so I don't bother as it seems to send out signals that I don't know how to deal with when things always seem to turn more serious.
I just don't understand this obsession with sex that seems to pervade every tiny facet of people's lives these days... surely there has to be more depth to people than that? If not then what the hell is wrong with me in that I don't and can't see things in the same way?!
Maybe I shouldn't bother in trying to find someone out there... if all I'm going to be is a place to rest their genitals then I'd rather be alone and stay true to myself... another reason that I'm grateful to prostitutes... they deal with the guys with one track minds so I don't have to!!
Guess I'm just a frigid prude.
I always knew I was different... now I know I am a total freak by today's (low) standards... not sure how I feel about that, being honest **shrugs**
Wednesday, 11 May 2011
I hate it when people lie to me
And when that person is a potential love interest it hurts even more when they finally admit the truth to your face.
See, I started something with someone online... and they basically used me for their own selfish ends and then dumped me and pretended like nothing happened. I don't think so!!
The part that hurt the most was that it is because of what I look like that they changed their opinion... and I told them it would, and they assured me it wouldn't matter, and then when they saw me everything changed, and although part of me was relieved another part of me was very hurt and also pissed off that I had been used and lied to the whole time!! It's taken me a week to finally get him to admit it, and now he has I feel surprisingly fine... sort of lighter and back to myself. I just needed him to tell the truth and stop feeding me bullshit and lies. I have no hard feelings and have told him that if he is willing to forget the past then so am I. I guess I'm just a forgiving kind of person and he is only 21 and probably still hurting from the break up of his first relationship two months ago. I like the guy and would still like to be his friend... but if not then I have lost nothing, and I can't change my nature and be a total bitch because that is not who I am... once my initial anger has faded I just have to get things back on a even keel again... it's just that I have to have that balance, but then I am a Libra and it shows ROFL!
If nothing else it has made me wary for the future, and also determined that nothing like it will ever happen again... and I'm also damned certain that I will never be suckered into situations that leave me wide open to being used again.
The past is the past, and I'll forgive but not forget. I firmly believe that to forget the past means you are doomed to repeat it, and that is never going to happen again. I do want a man in my life... but not one that is going to treat me like shit, I'm more than capable of treating myself like that and I need no help from anyone else... thank you very much.
As the old saying goes "Fool me once, shame on you... fool me twice, shame on me!"
See, I started something with someone online... and they basically used me for their own selfish ends and then dumped me and pretended like nothing happened. I don't think so!!
The part that hurt the most was that it is because of what I look like that they changed their opinion... and I told them it would, and they assured me it wouldn't matter, and then when they saw me everything changed, and although part of me was relieved another part of me was very hurt and also pissed off that I had been used and lied to the whole time!! It's taken me a week to finally get him to admit it, and now he has I feel surprisingly fine... sort of lighter and back to myself. I just needed him to tell the truth and stop feeding me bullshit and lies. I have no hard feelings and have told him that if he is willing to forget the past then so am I. I guess I'm just a forgiving kind of person and he is only 21 and probably still hurting from the break up of his first relationship two months ago. I like the guy and would still like to be his friend... but if not then I have lost nothing, and I can't change my nature and be a total bitch because that is not who I am... once my initial anger has faded I just have to get things back on a even keel again... it's just that I have to have that balance, but then I am a Libra and it shows ROFL!
If nothing else it has made me wary for the future, and also determined that nothing like it will ever happen again... and I'm also damned certain that I will never be suckered into situations that leave me wide open to being used again.
The past is the past, and I'll forgive but not forget. I firmly believe that to forget the past means you are doomed to repeat it, and that is never going to happen again. I do want a man in my life... but not one that is going to treat me like shit, I'm more than capable of treating myself like that and I need no help from anyone else... thank you very much.
As the old saying goes "Fool me once, shame on you... fool me twice, shame on me!"
Friday, 23 July 2010
I can't handle Xtianity anymore
I see nothing there for me.
I wish I could see it as others do, but I can't. Regardless of how hard I try all I can see is guilt and fear and sin and evil... and all of the wrong things seem to fall under those headings - things like sex (outside of marriage), homosexuality, masturbation, abortion, having a different faith. All of them to some extent are condemned by Xtianity and I hate that so much. How can a religion proclaim to be about love when it says such hateful things?
I just do not understand what I'm meant to find so appealing about the prospect of millions of innocent people being punished for all eternity in Hell, for things they may or may not even realise were 'sins', by a God that is forever portrayed as the epitome of 'Love'. Because you always roast the ones you love in flames for eternity' don't you?! *sigh*
I'm probably sounding this scornful because I'm tired and disappointed by the views and opinions of a select few individuals at an online forum... but to my mind, any religion that enables and seems to actively encourage such hatred and evil is not the one that this easy-going, pro-choice, pro-LGBTQI rights, pro-freedom of religion pagan/goth is meant to be a part of!
Sometimes I wish I could see Xtianity as most Xtians see it, but mostly I'm just glad to be pagan and be able to live and let live, without the pressure of having to force myself to believe and practice things that are abhorrant to me!
I wish I could see it as others do, but I can't. Regardless of how hard I try all I can see is guilt and fear and sin and evil... and all of the wrong things seem to fall under those headings - things like sex (outside of marriage), homosexuality, masturbation, abortion, having a different faith. All of them to some extent are condemned by Xtianity and I hate that so much. How can a religion proclaim to be about love when it says such hateful things?
I just do not understand what I'm meant to find so appealing about the prospect of millions of innocent people being punished for all eternity in Hell, for things they may or may not even realise were 'sins', by a God that is forever portrayed as the epitome of 'Love'. Because you always roast the ones you love in flames for eternity' don't you?! *sigh*
I'm probably sounding this scornful because I'm tired and disappointed by the views and opinions of a select few individuals at an online forum... but to my mind, any religion that enables and seems to actively encourage such hatred and evil is not the one that this easy-going, pro-choice, pro-LGBTQI rights, pro-freedom of religion pagan/goth is meant to be a part of!
Sometimes I wish I could see Xtianity as most Xtians see it, but mostly I'm just glad to be pagan and be able to live and let live, without the pressure of having to force myself to believe and practice things that are abhorrant to me!
Tuesday, 20 July 2010
Bye bye peace and quiet... and all things mobile phone-y!
Sissy and Pingu have come back from their four day wedding attendance thingie. They were in the house about five minutes before I felt crowded and quite claustrophobic in their presence. Maybe because they are both so very noisy and I'm not? Who knows. Plus, their chattering made me miss the first 20 minutes of Big Brother, which is a total crime!
My new mobile is really pissing me off... it has Bluetooth - but it can only be used for a headset and not for sending files, like phonebook contacts, music or pictures! I've never heard of a phone not being able to do that! I think I shall be taking it back... again. First the Sony one I tried (W995) got no signal at all in the house, anywhere, even upstairs! Now this one doesn't have proper Bluetooth.
It might seem trivial to some, but I like to be able to take pictures with me if I change phones, plus I like to be able to share them with other people, same goes for music... stupid LG GW620, I was just getting used to the phone when I found out. I have no idea which phone to go for now... I've been reading reviews online and none of the phones available for my monthly contract amount are very good. The best one seems to be the Nokia E72, so I might go for that one. I'm using Mum's old E63 at the moment and it has one bar of signal sat in our kitchen (which is fairly average for Virgin Mobile, 2 bars now, lol). I'm wondering if I should just cancel the contract altogether and just stay on ASDA (which use Vodafone signal towers, so it gets good coverage in the house, rarely below 2 bars even in this black spot of a kitchen we have... I blame the four storey houses across the road and the huge Victorian brick church on the corner, plus living at the bottom end of a hill, hehe), but I'd really like a new phone (my current phone a SonyEricsson K800i I've had for almost four years, and I always seem to come back to it eventually... it takes stunning pictures).
The only problem is that I can only get a contract with Virgin (I fail the credit checks for all the rest) and as a Virgin Media customer I also get extras on top, too. It's just finding a phone that ticks enough of the boxes of things that I feel are important in a phone... and some kind of signal and working Bluetooth are on my list, near the very top of it actually.
My new mobile is really pissing me off... it has Bluetooth - but it can only be used for a headset and not for sending files, like phonebook contacts, music or pictures! I've never heard of a phone not being able to do that! I think I shall be taking it back... again. First the Sony one I tried (W995) got no signal at all in the house, anywhere, even upstairs! Now this one doesn't have proper Bluetooth.
It might seem trivial to some, but I like to be able to take pictures with me if I change phones, plus I like to be able to share them with other people, same goes for music... stupid LG GW620, I was just getting used to the phone when I found out. I have no idea which phone to go for now... I've been reading reviews online and none of the phones available for my monthly contract amount are very good. The best one seems to be the Nokia E72, so I might go for that one. I'm using Mum's old E63 at the moment and it has one bar of signal sat in our kitchen (which is fairly average for Virgin Mobile, 2 bars now, lol). I'm wondering if I should just cancel the contract altogether and just stay on ASDA (which use Vodafone signal towers, so it gets good coverage in the house, rarely below 2 bars even in this black spot of a kitchen we have... I blame the four storey houses across the road and the huge Victorian brick church on the corner, plus living at the bottom end of a hill, hehe), but I'd really like a new phone (my current phone a SonyEricsson K800i I've had for almost four years, and I always seem to come back to it eventually... it takes stunning pictures).
The only problem is that I can only get a contract with Virgin (I fail the credit checks for all the rest) and as a Virgin Media customer I also get extras on top, too. It's just finding a phone that ticks enough of the boxes of things that I feel are important in a phone... and some kind of signal and working Bluetooth are on my list, near the very top of it actually.
Wednesday, 27 January 2010
I've decided to leave UKP...
... at least for now. After being quite shocked by the attitudes of some of the posters in the obesity thread (well one in particular... stupid cow)... and then after writing out a long reply and being totally ignored, I've come to the conclusion that I might as well not be there. I've felt that way for a while now, I always get the feeling that whatever I say is never good enough, appreciated or even wanted, so why should I waste my time anymore? **shrugs**
I've deleted everything over there, but I've left my blog as it will gradually get pushed down the listing as others update theirs... my avatar, sig, profile info and profile picture have all gone. I'm not going to tell anyone as there is no-one there that will care, so why bother. If I did then I would only get people coming along and slagging me off for being an attention whore and be accused of trying to get sympathy or trying to get people to change my mind... I've seen it happen before and I don't what to have it happen to me.
I've removed the link from my links here... if anyone wants to visit the forum go to http://thevalley.ukpagan.com... and good luck if you do!
Tuesday, 26 January 2010
That was a mistake!
Going to UKP and reading some of the posts... one was about obesity and I have just been enraged and disappointed by some of the things that I've read there. As a fat person I have faced a lot of verbal abuse over the years about my size... but apparently it is more or less my own fault for eating too much and exercising too little... it is that cut and dried!
[sarcasm] Why didn't I ever think of that? And there was me thinking that just because I happen to be fat that I deserved the right to go about my daily life without total strangers shouting disgusting things at me... silly me... maybe I should just kill myself so as not to offend people that don't give a shit if they offend, belittle and mock me!! [/sarcasm]
I have to say that I pity people that feel they have to be mean to others, just to make their friends laugh or make themselves feel better about their life. Just as well I don't feel the need to do the same really, isn't it?! Stupid, intolerant fuckwits would be top of my hit list, LOL!
Saturday, 2 January 2010
What a way to start the new year!!
I had a headache, and I only had one newcastle brown ale shandy, so I can't even blame the drink, LOL!!
I actually made some resolutions for this year, I will probably break them all, but I'll have a go just the same, hehe.
I actually made some resolutions for this year, I will probably break them all, but I'll have a go just the same, hehe.
- Eat more sensibly.
- Lose some weight (at least two stone).
- Get more exercise.
- Chill out and stop moaning.
- Stop worrying.
- Stay positive.
Sunday, 22 November 2009
Whoops!!
Well that didn't work... in fact it failed on an epic scale!
The RUSK Elimin8 Colour Remover didn't do quite as I expected... it did remove the black from the roots, shame it left behind a garish bright orange colour instead! Not good as the roots were my natural colour!!!!! As for the black on the ends?? Well, that seems to be a very dark maroon -ish colour that is very nearly black! My hair looks dreadful and it also smells really bad, too! (even though I shampooed it twice and conditioned it, too).
Not sure what my next move is, to be honest... do I try and dye it light brown and see if the ends will lighten? Do I cut it all off and start again? Do I just leave it as it is and say I dyed it like that for Children in Need or a bet? Or do I dye it black again in order to cover over the mess that it now is, ending up right back at square one?
**sigh**
Think I'll try getting a good quality light-ish brown and see if it works... if not then it looks like I'll be getting a very short haircut after all, LOL!!!!
The RUSK Elimin8 Colour Remover didn't do quite as I expected... it did remove the black from the roots, shame it left behind a garish bright orange colour instead! Not good as the roots were my natural colour!!!!! As for the black on the ends?? Well, that seems to be a very dark maroon -ish colour that is very nearly black! My hair looks dreadful and it also smells really bad, too! (even though I shampooed it twice and conditioned it, too).
Not sure what my next move is, to be honest... do I try and dye it light brown and see if the ends will lighten? Do I cut it all off and start again? Do I just leave it as it is and say I dyed it like that for Children in Need or a bet? Or do I dye it black again in order to cover over the mess that it now is, ending up right back at square one?
**sigh**
Think I'll try getting a good quality light-ish brown and see if it works... if not then it looks like I'll be getting a very short haircut after all, LOL!!!!
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