I went back to the doctors yesterday...

... and according to the viscious woman locum that I saw I have tendonitis in my shoulder. She pushed an area in my shoulder so much that I was on the verge of tears, and if she had of touched me once more I would have lamped her one with my left hand! I could still feel her fingers digging into my flesh eight hours later (that is how hard she pushed me about!)

She would have told me to carry on taking ibuprofen tablets, even though I told her just how badly they effected my digestive system (pain is not the word)... until I told her that I was never taking them again, regardless of how bad my arm felt in the future! She eventually gave me Naprosyn 500mg tablets... and even though I've only taken two my arm is burning less, so it's looking good so far (and I'm able to type so it's looking even better than two days ago when I could barely even move!)

As long as they don't give me digestive pain/discomfort I'll keep taking them, but if they give me any kind of grief then I'm straight back to that doctors and demanding something else! My digestion is so fragile these days, and I'm not going to make trouble for the future by aggrievating it and possibly giving myself an ulcer or something like that (because knowing my luck that is exactly the kind of thing that would happen!! LOL)

When will the pain stop?

I now have a new, and vastly more intense pain in my arm, where it meets my shoulder near my armpit... when I lean forwards too far I get a feeling like I'm being stabbed (not that I've ever been stabbed, I'm guessing about that one).

Instead of the steady, deep burning in the rest of my arm, the new pain is sharp, intense and takes my breath away (and also gets me sort of jumping to attention as standing straight is the only way to stop it, though there is a shadow of pain always lingering there!)

I just don't know what to do. I loathe the prospect of going back to our useless doctor, but I don't think I'm going to have much choice if this doesn't ease soon!

And my arm still hurts!

In fact it feels worse as my wrist is now burning in three different places! 

I'm also convinced that the diclofenac is doing things to my digestive system, too... I have the feeling inside that under normal circumstances would have me thinking that I'd eaten onions (or some kind of allium). Not a nice feeling at all. I'm still going to take them, at least until they give me pain (at the moment I have all symptoms except pain, so it's not too bad). I still have to take painkillers, though, which is annoying me as some of them seem to make me feel weird in the head (which is not very helpful!). I get that feeling with anything other than just plain paracetamol... so I'm going to have to buy some more soon.

Having rain every day is not helping either... all of that damp air is making my arthritis sheer hell! So much for the weather prediction of two days with rain in the next fortnight... I think someone is fibbing, LOL!

What a bloody cheek!

And the day had so much promise before I went to bed last night, LOL! I had planned to do so many things... I was going to get out in the garden and now the weather looks as if it's going to pour with rain... and I am a total fair weather gardener (bad, I know).

I've also been put into a pissed mood by the delivery of the post this morning. We received an invitation to a wedding reception from my cousin... well, Mum and Dad did, I wasn't even mentioned, so I presume my presence is surplus to requirements, then!! I'm only the one that would have to drive them there, and I then, what? turn around and come home again?! Plus we aren't even worthy to attend the actual ceremony, just the party afterwards! So we can't actually go the bit that matters, but we can go the part that means we have to take a gift! Bloody cheek... they basically want our money in the form of a present then, not for us to actually see them get married. Fuck off!!

This is why I like not having a close knit family... most of them are total bastards that don't give a shit! This invite from the cousin that I haven't seen since the death of our grandfather about 14 years ago. I seriously could have walked past him in the street and I wouldn't have known it, I can't even remember what he looks like anymore. He knows where we have been for all of these years, we haven't moved, unlike him who has been all over the country and then was in India for I don't know how long. I would have preferred to have got no invite at all instead of the one for the reception. Whatever, but then I'm not invited anyway, am I? It's addressed to Mum and Dad only, my name is nowhere to be seen!

It's also on the same day as the final part of the first aid course I have to do, and I'm sorry, but the first aid is vastly more important to me than attending the wedding of a virtual stranger, so I wouldn't be going even if I had been invited! He can take his invitation, roll it up into a tight tube and then shove it up his arse as high as he can get it!! That is what I think about his "reception only" offer! See how he sits at the top table with that little lot blocking his rectum! LOL!

Dad has said that sadly he's not going to be able to go, as his leg is going to be hurting and stop him from walking that day... such a shame  **laughs like a manic**

To top off the day being crap before it even started, I woke up with my arm hurting as much as ever, and now I have to work with our 16 year old autistic guy at 3pm until he's collected (whenever that maybe) tonight (I love him dearly, and am looking forward to seeing him, don't get me wrong, but I'd planned to not be working until Monday... and I always get a bit fed up when I have to change my plans at the last minute  **grumpypants**)

The way your interests change

I was reading at one of my favourite forums about the religion of Ancient Egypt and about the modern day people that follow it in Pagan circles and I replied saying just how uninteresting I now find the topic... amazing when you consider just how I was obsessed with Ancient Egypt about 8 years ago! I have books (over forty of varying ages), tv shows, figurines, jewellery... I even have two scarves that have hieroglyphics on them, lol!

What's weird is that now, at this present time, I have no interest in Ancient Egypt at all... nothing, nada, zip! I was watching a programme about Hatshepsut the other day and I couldn't have been less interested if I'd been watching paint dry... to say I was bored would be an under statement... and I don't understand it at all. To go from thinking about virtually nothing else for years, to being in this state of abject not caring is fairly alarming, even worrying to me. Very rarely do I lose total interest in something that I used to love, and when I do I sort of seem to enter a kind of mourning phase for the thing/s I leave behind... and most of the time it doesn't last very long and something always comes along to pique my interest again after a while. Sadly I don't think anything is going to relight my passion for Ancient Egypt... I've felt like this for roughly 8 years and as each year passes I seem to care less and less.

I asked for advice on how to re-ignite my interest... but I don't think there is going to be an answer that will help me. I wonder if I've moved on from that phase in my life to something else? I don't know what to, as I have no current obsession with anything much at present, just many things I like, nothing that would be classed as obsession.

I wonder if I'm just too tired, in pain and worrying about my job to give my full attention to much of anything these days... (though I'm hoping to get out in the garden over the weekend and have a bit of a tidy up, bad arm permitting... I'm actually hoping that giving it some gentle exercise will help in loosening it up and help me to move it more, well it can't hurt... well, it really can, but I guess it hurts anyway so at least I can get the dead plants out of the ground and still be in pain rather than stare at their woody corpses out of the window all of the time LOL!!)

It's all just so weird!

**I have a new keyboard now which makes typing easier, if not painless, so at least I can type without having red hot daggers flare up under my skin... always nice I find to not have that feeling, LOL!**

Quick post

I accidentally deleted the entry I typed out before this!

My arm is no better, in fact it feels worse! I am also having to type out everything with one hand (and I keep hitting a button that activates some kind of shortcut and it either opens random stuff up or refreshes the page as it just did and then deletes the stuff I've just written!!!)

I'm having to use my right hand to type this as I'm too frustrated to keep losing the things I type using the one hand! Giving me total pain, but at least I've not hit the wrong button yet, lol.

I have not done any writing with my right hand for over a week, and my left hand writing is coming on nicely, though still resembles a kids and I'm getting really annoyed at the slow progress (I just think I'm getting somewhere and then it seems to go back a pace... I'm just so impatient *sigh*)

Anyway... apart from that all is good... I have another three day weekend as the kids are not here tomorrow, yippee. So glad the holidays are over.

Am off to get a special steering wheel handle to aid me in driving with the good arm tomorrow... hopefully it will help, and I can always remove it when I don't need it anymore. Must stop typing now as my right wrist is burning and I've got another dizzy spell coming on.

TTFN for now :o)

A quick (and short) update

At the moment I'm in real pain with my right arm. The cold and damp spell in the weather, not to mention all of the lifting and stuff I've done lately has really left me in total pain in my right arm. I can't lift it very high, hold anything of any weight and just typing this I can feel pain running right up into my shoulder. I'm even having to write with my left hand and I've had to switch my mouse buttons, too... really frustrating for someone right handed!

I'll not be writing here until my wrist and arm feel better... I just can't bear the pain of it.


Speak to you all very soon :o)