Lately I have been dreaming about onion rings...

 ... and I've realised that my body may have been misleading me.

For years I thought I was intolerant to many different fruits and vegetables, but now I'm wondering if that is actually the case?

A few years ago, maybe three or four, I started to have terrible digestion problems; bloating, cramps, flatulence, constipation, diarrhoea, and sometimes stomach pains so intense they would send me to bed, where I would curl up into the smallest ball possible and have to try and sleep (sleep was the only thing that used to help). It got so bad that I turned to Google and discovered IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) which seemed to list everything I suffered from. Knowing that my doctors rarely take me seriously, I decided to do an elimination test to see if I could find the “trigger” foods myself. I started to keep a food diary where I wrote down, without fail, every single thing that I ate or drank (although I didn't weigh food, that's just too much hassle lol). Not only did I write down what I ate, I also wrote down how it made me feel, and also how it effected my toilet habits. By doing this, over many months (and much pain) I found numerous triggers... the whole allium family (onions, garlic, shallots, leeks, chives and all granules, dried forms, salts and extracts containing them), peppers, sweetcorn, mushrooms, beetroot, swede, broccoli, cabbage, grapes, bananas, all squashes and pumpkin, spinach, courgettes, cauliflower, white flour products (bread, cakes, pasta, cous cous, etc), green peas, green beans... in short any veg that wasn't potatoes, sweet potatoes or carrots would give me trouble. Fruit was better, as long as I stayed away from grapes and bananas. Bakery products had to be brown, wholemeal, wholewheat, etc.

As you can imagine I wasn't a happy bunny, although my digestion was happier when I cut all of them out of my diet. The up side was I lost about four stone because I just couldn't eat most junk food, ready meals, pre-packaged foods or takeaways.

Oh, as well as the fruit and veg intolerances I also discovered that lactose caused me nasty trouble, so that meant most milk, cheese, yoghurt, cream , ice cream and anything else dairy was off limits (until I found a brand called Lactofree that I was ok with).  Plus I had trouble with chicken eggs... although I was ok with duck eggs (apart from the high price and even higher cholesterol content!)

Fast forward to about June 2015...

June 15th 2015 I decided to be a vegetarian... I forget now what prompted that decision... I may have written the reasons down in an old diary somewhere, but anyway.  People thought I was mad as I had so many bad reactions to so much veg, how could I possibly be a vegetarian? I admit I wondered myself, but I was determined to try.

After suffering bad headaches and sinus problems I discovered that dairy can cause that sort of thing. I decided to do a two week dairy elimination test to see if that was the cause of my pain. After about a week my sinuses felt a lot better and my headaches had decreased to almost nothing. Then, ten days into the two week test my sister had her birthday. Her fiancé got her a cake that was egg free but that contained cream... I took some lactase capsules (they used to help me digest the lactose so I didn't have a really bad time on the rare occasions I wanted something I shouldn't really have had lol). Within an hour of eating the cake my nose was blocked and I had a headache. It showed me that dairy and I were no longer friends and I decided to cut it out of my life completely... for good!
At about the same time I had been reading more and more about veganism, and all it entailed, and after a rocky start became a vegan on 15th July 2015.

As you can imagine those around me were worried as there were just so many foods I couldn't eat... what the hell does a vegan with so many intolerances to vegetables actually eat?! Luckily I didn't starve to death as I'm fine with wholewheat bread products, rice, wholewheat pasta and had grown used to making my own food from scratch.

I'm also one of those people that is always dumb enough to try things I know I probably shouldn't... and yes, I'm often surprised when I get bad reactions hahaha. However, in this case it proved to be a good thing as I was able to gradually reintroduce a lot of foods back into my diet... mushrooms, sweetcorn, broccoli, spinach, green beans, courgettes, and cabbage (including Brussels sprouts). I also discovered kale and avocados didn't hate me.

The one group that always made me really sad were the alliums as they are in so much food, the basis for so many amazing dishes, and also hard to avoid in vegan “junk food” and sauces (be they cooking sauces, pasta sauces, even stuff like ketchup). The sheer amount of onion powder, garlic powder, onion salt, garlic extract, onion granules, chives, and any combination of the above is astounding... I never knew just how much food contained one or many of them. It was a total shopping nightmare. Either products contained them, or were reformulated without any warning once I had already started using them (like Asda did once with some bbq sauce, lucky for me I'm a habitual paranoid label checker lol).

Fast forward again to about a month ago...

I have bouts of “bravery” regarding food. If my digestion has been doing ok I feel courageous enough to try foods that I normally avoid (that must be the masochist in me). I wanted to see if my intolerance to alliums was still bad, so got some Linda McCartney vegan sausage rolls that contain onion powder (I think) but no garlic so I thought it would let me know if onions still hated me (some people are affected by one, either or both... I was effected by both). I ate two sausage rolls and waited for the problems. None came. No pain, no bloating... nothing. I was pleasantly surprised. One more food to add to the plate. Then it got me thinking... if I could have onion powder, could I have garlic? (Not that I like garlic much, I just had to know). I found a Chinese BBQ sauce that had garlic but no onions and tried it. It wasn't very nice taste wise (although there was some slight discomfort). Then I thought, if onion powder was ok, maybe try something like dried chives. I used some as a garnish on some soup and again, no reaction!

Fast forward to today and so far I have had, onion powder, onion granules, onion extract, garlic powder, garlic extract, dried chives... and a large bowl of home-made leek and potato soup... with no comeback at all! I've had spicy burgers with onions, garlic and peppers... no comeback. I had some green peas the other day... with no comeback! To say I'm stunned is an understatement. I've been avoiding all these foods for years because of problems and now I don't have the problems (at least I don't think I do anyway... my next “try” is actual onion, I've bought onion rings and also red onions as well).

So what could have happened to suddenly make my stomach not hate most of the foods it used to (bananas still constipate me, but I was never much of a fan of theirs anyway lol).

It made me think... why now? What have I changed that could have such a drastic impact on my digestive system? And then one day it hit me... could it be because I'm vegan? Could the meat I ate for years have actually been the trigger for my problems and not the veg? I always had trouble digesting pork, it never liked me much. Steak often made me constipated. Any fish used to repeat on me so much I would want to vomit just to get the taste of it out of my mouth! Lamb would bloat me, and to a lesser extent so would chicken and turkey (although I never realised it). It made me wonder if I had been blaming the veg I would have with the meat for the trouble whereas I should have been blaming the meat! It just seems weird that I can now eat a lot of the things that gave me the worst reactions with no reactions at all... surely if something was so hard on the digestion that it would send you to bed that would never fully go away, regardless of how long between exposures.

Could nearly 16 months without meat have helped my digestive system to heal itself enough so that the “evil veg” doesn't cause any problems? Could the meat have been causing irritation and then the veg merely exacerbating a reaction already there?

Could I actually have been intolerant to meat the whole time and just never knew it?

Honestly I don't have a definite answer to any of those questions. All I can say is that I know how I feel, and that is fine. Maybe a little flatulence (who never has that?) but farts don't give me pain.

I guess that even if I hadn't become vegan for moral and ethical reasons, my body was screaming out for me to become one for health reasons. I just never knew it until now.

I'm going to take it slowly, I don't want to get my hopes fully up only to have them crushed by pain (which has happened many times before, when I've tried things in the past by jumping in head first instead of gently testing the waters with a toe at a time).

It has made me wonder if I should share my experiences with an allium intolerance group I'm in at Facebook? Obviously those with an allergy wouldn't benefit from reading it, allergies can be medically tested for whereas intolerances cannot, it is simply trial and error on the part of the intolerant person that discovers the triggers. But if meat could be behind my problems, couldn't it also be the same for others that might not even realise it?

I've changed the background to something bright and cheerful...

... because I'm sick and tired of winter now. I'm fed up of being cold and I'm bored of grey skies and dreadful weather! Roll on spring, I say (and I don't like warmer weather in the main, but I'm a bit disheartened with it being so bleak and miserable all the time).

I quite like tulips, they aren't my favourite flower, but I love the myriad colours they come in and they certainly do have a knack of cheering up dullness.

I've finally got the results from the doctor. Turns out I have a severe vitamin D deficiency. I'm now on a super strength supplement tablet (which is vile, by the way... note to companies making these things - if a tablet has to be either sucked or chewed you could at least make it taste pleasant... is that too much to ask?) I've only taken two so far as they are one a day, so I haven't noticed any change yet as it's too early. I just hope that they work... I don't know what happens if I still feel like crap in a few months time. What if the vit D thing is just something they found and not the cause of the aches and pains I'm suffering from? I guess I shall have to cross that bridge if I ever come to it.

I wish that sciatica was as quick to abate as it is to arrive... it can take seconds for it to appear and you're in agony for days/weeks until it decides to pack it's painful bags and sod off again! Mine seems to have come to stay for longer than the weekend, though. I hope it's not going to be visiting for much longer... I've been in bed for two days and already I feel like I'm going mad lol. Unlike last time it is mainly in my left leg so sitting isn't too bad, it's walking and bending that leaves me gasping for air. As I can sit down I've been trying to get some writing done.

I like writing, when I'm in the mood (which isn't very often as my concentration span is minute at the moment... pain does that to me) - but I found a book I started writing almost two years ago. It's set in London during the Blitz and it follows the life and struggles of a young woman called Tilly. I'm thinking of making her under twenty, that way she won't be conscripted into war work and I can develop her character more fully. Of course she'll volunteer for something, probably the WVS as I have first hand diary accounts of that branch of the voluntary services I can draw information from. I had only written a basic 'chapter one' before I put it down the first time (yeah, I'm easily distracted!)
  I'm unsure as to how long the piece should be, a full novel, novella or short story? I'm leaning towards novella and see how I go... it can be edited down or padded out to become either of the others if I find the story grows or I run out of ideas hahaha. I like to keep my options open.
  Normally I write poetry... mostly short and they have to rhyme. I don't like poetry that doesn't rhyme, it makes no sense to me, it doesn't 'flow'. I'm not a natural novelist, and I envy those people that seem to have hundreds of pages of stuff floating about in their brains. Part of my problem is that I'm impatient to get it all written down... so many times I have good things in my head and by the time I come to write them down they have disappeared, never to return! So frustrating to me, and I begin to lose heart, and interest, so I just stop. I also struggle in being descriptive, of conveying the pictures I have in my head down for others to read about and absorb.
  Apart from poems I have only ever completed one novella, in my life. A murder mystery, all written in long hand, and probably not very good... but at least I can say I have written one book lol.

Anyway, it's late and my painkillers are starting to work so I should try and sleep. I've had a bad few nights as I just get comfy and something spasms in my back or legs and I wake up again. Not helpful, not at all *sigh*

Long time no blog

I've not been here for a while now and I've got nothing really exciting to say.

Life is ticking along the same as ever really... except that my Nan is now unable to use any of her limbs because she just seemed to give up after her stroke (and it wasn't even a severe stroke as she only really lost her ability to stand at first). Now she will have to go into a care home as she's basically a quadraplegic and can do nothing for herself. I was sad at first, but now at least I won't have to worry about her falling over at home or burning her hand on the oven (like she did once before). She'll be safe and cared for and not many 90 year olds can say that.

Xmas always leaves me feeling a bit sad these days. Part of me misses that excitement that I used to feel, but the bigger part of me just sees this time of year as a time to mourn. It's the seventh anniversary of my beloved Grandmother's death on the 26th December. Time has healed the raw pain but there is still that scar that never properly heals and that sometimes causes me pain when I least expect it. I still miss her so very much, and I can feel the tears forming as I write this. She still had so much left to teach me and when she was here I made no effort to learn... and now it's too late and my opportunities have all gone. If I could pass one piece of advice on to all those that have elders that want to teach you something you're not too keen to learn, it would be this  -  accept the lessons while you have the chance, once the teacher is gone it's too late! Don't let yourself carry regrets from the past because you couldn't be bothered to shut up and listen for once.

Grief is a strange emotion. It strikes at random times. I was laughing earlier and now I feel as if I could howl my eyes out. I'm not a fan of crying as it leaves me feeling drained and exhausted, but sometimes it is the only thing that relieves the pain and tension... like screaming when you're angry eases the rage.

I think the hardest part about this time of year for me is seeing Mum get upset. We're not really an "emotional" family. We rarely cry tears of sadness and me being as soft as velvet under my pretend tough exterior means that when I see my parents cry I burst into tears myself. I try and be strong but sometimes I just can't be.

I need to stop writing or else I shall just break down.

A blessed Beltane to everyone reading this

Not much has occurred since my last entry.

The house has slowly become used to only having one cat... it seems so weird with just one, for over five years we have had two, and the first time we went shopping we added the extra food to the trolley out of habit :o(

Anyway... the weather here has been truly dismal of late; rain, high winds, leaden grey skies, and various assortments of the three. Yesterday and today there has actually been sunshine (I was beginning to think the sun was merely a myth!) and it has made all the difference. I'm not a fan of sitting in the sun, but it does lift my mood when that fiery, yellow ball in the sky can be seen and felt... sometimes lol.

I feel generally unwell... nothing I can put my finger on, but yet again I cannot seem to shake off a cold/flu virus thing that I went down with a few weeks ago and feel so drained of energy throughout the day that I am often forced back to bed in the middle of the afternoon! Not helpful.


My faith has also taken another setback recently in that I feel my connection to Selene is waning... often to the point of being non-existent! I hate this... the constant running in circles where faith is concerned, it makes me sad that I cannot seem to make a decision and stick to it and be happy. Actually it infuriates me!

Add to that, the fact that Blogger seem to have made unwanted changes to everything here and I'm feeling pretty fed-up at the moment. It has taken me ten minutes to find my dashboard here, and even longer to find the posts available for edit. *sigh* If a change is not for the better, please don't bother making it!!

Wow, long time between updates.

I wish I could say that my life has been a hectic whirlwind of fun and laughter, with barely a moment to sit down and catch my breath... but alas it has just been the same old mundane routine, only with the added bonus of finding out that I'm totally out of work around the end of November (date yet to be confirmed!)

After doing the same job for about 20 years, and feeling thoroughly drained and fed up I've decided to take some time out when the current children leave... I just can't do this anymore and I need a break (Mum feels the same and we work together). We will be able to survive, although things will be tight, but I have to say that I'm looking forward to having some peace and quiet and not having to keep "watching the clock" for school pick-ups! Christmas will be a no present affair, but with the fifth anniversary of Nana's death on the 26th of December, christmas has long been a time of mourning for me. Christmas is really for kids anyway, and I only used to look forward to it for having the tree up with the lovely lights, and also the time off that we always got then.

The dating sites are a total waste of time and I don't visit them anymore except when I get rare messages. I had one guy that I didn't even know message me insults one Friday night (so I assume he was drunk... or just a dickhead, he soon got a piece of mind in return and also reported and blocked). Then I had a guy called Jose track me down from one site for larger women (that I joined and forgot about), to Facebook... and then he found me at a separate dating site as well (stalker much?!) The funny part was he got pissed off when I refused his offer of going out for a cup of tea (that was his first message, like I'd say yes to meeting a total stranger!). Then he got pissed off because I didn't ask him out anywhere... I don't even ask my friends out so why he thought I'd ask him is beyond me altogether lol... and then he got pissed off when I asked him to stop bothering me and he said that I was actually bothering HIM! hahaha. When I pointed out that he was the one that tracked me down at three different places, he had the gall to call me "pathetic." My reply to him was this:

Being pathetic yourself I suppose you recognise the same trait in others. Just piss off and leave me alone. You started talking to me, you found me at other places. Just get over yourself, get a life and get out of mine. I want nothing to do with you so just GO AWAY! 

A little harsh, maybe, but I no longer have patience with people that feel that I owe them something, when I actually owe them nothing. I tried to be nice and I'd asked him to not bother replying to me as he had nothing to say that I wished to read (and that got the "pathetic" response)... and I just lost my temper and let him have both barrels, so to speak. I then changed my Facebook settings so that people have to be at least "friends of friends" in order to send me messages (and not "everyone" that I had before), and I blocked him from the last site he followed me to (I didn't bother with the first site as I'm not a full member and can't read messages without paying them money which I'm not doing anymore).

I'm quite looking forward to Samhain (although as usual I completely forgot about Mabon and only remembered when people sent me "Blessed Mabon" pictures online lol! (did I mention that I'm a lazy pagan hehe). Samhain is different as I pay my respects to my passed over family... it's more personal somehow for me and I at least have to light candles for each of those that I have loved and lost. Then it's Bonfire Night, with the free fireworks display and then it's Yule and the New Year. The year seems to have whizzed past and we are back to the cold weather again (though hopefully not a repeat of the snow and ice we had at the beginning of the year!)

I went back to the doctors yesterday...

... and according to the viscious woman locum that I saw I have tendonitis in my shoulder. She pushed an area in my shoulder so much that I was on the verge of tears, and if she had of touched me once more I would have lamped her one with my left hand! I could still feel her fingers digging into my flesh eight hours later (that is how hard she pushed me about!)

She would have told me to carry on taking ibuprofen tablets, even though I told her just how badly they effected my digestive system (pain is not the word)... until I told her that I was never taking them again, regardless of how bad my arm felt in the future! She eventually gave me Naprosyn 500mg tablets... and even though I've only taken two my arm is burning less, so it's looking good so far (and I'm able to type so it's looking even better than two days ago when I could barely even move!)

As long as they don't give me digestive pain/discomfort I'll keep taking them, but if they give me any kind of grief then I'm straight back to that doctors and demanding something else! My digestion is so fragile these days, and I'm not going to make trouble for the future by aggrievating it and possibly giving myself an ulcer or something like that (because knowing my luck that is exactly the kind of thing that would happen!! LOL)

Hopefully I have my laptop back (for the most part anyway)

Mum is using Sissy's. Sissy never really uses hers (a lovely Sony that she got for uni... all she does is watch videos and put songs on her iPod). Hopefully this means that I have mine back, and I've so missed it I can tell you.

Hopefully it means that I can be around more than I'd thought I would be. I was so bored and frustrated using the old laptop yesterday, it got so bad that I shut the thing down and watched tv instead!

So I've dug out an old laptop

... and I do mean OLD! It's running Windows XP, that is how old it is! (of the three laptops I've ever owned, this one is number two).

It is so slow that it's not even funny. It also seems to dislike DragCave, which is very bad news... it does stuff there, but soooo ssslllooowwwlllyyy. Even writing this here it keeps freezing and saying that it's not responding, then all of the words I've typed all appear at once... most weird (but typical).

The shop have been on to Mum about her laptop, and as they don't actually deal with the brand of machine she has and they are going to have to send it back to the makers (after they get the parts sent to them and then send it all on to them...don't ask!) they have told her that it could take 6-8 WEEKS!!!

That makes it sometime in late October/early November before she'll get it back... she's not a happy bunny, but there is nothing that she can do about it.

The amount of time it's taken to write this I think I could have written a note, attached it to the leg of a carrier pigeon and sent it off flying to Blogger HQ and let someone there type it out for me! Just when I think things are going well it suddenly freezes and I'm sat there staring at the bloody annoying little hourglass, spinning end over end telling me that the computer is not doing what I want it to! ARGH!

Anyway... at least I have some means of getting online that doesn't involve disturbing Mum when she's doing her stuff... it may be slow and frustrating, but at least I can still talk to my friends and (incredibly slowly) deal with my dragons.

I do wish that the spacebar was more friendly, though... it takes a lot of pressure to get it to actually do its job, lol!

Anyway...

Explaining my possible absence

So Mum is having to send her laptop away for repairs... which means that I'm going to have to let Mum use my laptop as she does vastly more online than I do (talking to peeps on MSN and playing Farmville and stuff like that... my time online is usually limited to posting in forums and playing DragCave).

They are coming to collect it between 1-7pm today (!) and it could be gone for 3-10 days (depending on the problem... we are hoping it's just the fan as it's making a nasty whirring noise, so hopefully it should be a fairly easy fix... LOLOLOL!!)

Mum is quite upset at it going, but it should come back better than it is now, so it's all good.

It means that my online time is going to be severely limited so if I'm not around, now you know why (plus my arm is killing me, so it may do me some good).

Talk soon, take care, and be good until I get back (and if you can't be good, be careful, hehe).

 

Quick post

I accidentally deleted the entry I typed out before this!

My arm is no better, in fact it feels worse! I am also having to type out everything with one hand (and I keep hitting a button that activates some kind of shortcut and it either opens random stuff up or refreshes the page as it just did and then deletes the stuff I've just written!!!)

I'm having to use my right hand to type this as I'm too frustrated to keep losing the things I type using the one hand! Giving me total pain, but at least I've not hit the wrong button yet, lol.

I have not done any writing with my right hand for over a week, and my left hand writing is coming on nicely, though still resembles a kids and I'm getting really annoyed at the slow progress (I just think I'm getting somewhere and then it seems to go back a pace... I'm just so impatient *sigh*)

Anyway... apart from that all is good... I have another three day weekend as the kids are not here tomorrow, yippee. So glad the holidays are over.

Am off to get a special steering wheel handle to aid me in driving with the good arm tomorrow... hopefully it will help, and I can always remove it when I don't need it anymore. Must stop typing now as my right wrist is burning and I've got another dizzy spell coming on.

TTFN for now :o)

A quick (and short) update

At the moment I'm in real pain with my right arm. The cold and damp spell in the weather, not to mention all of the lifting and stuff I've done lately has really left me in total pain in my right arm. I can't lift it very high, hold anything of any weight and just typing this I can feel pain running right up into my shoulder. I'm even having to write with my left hand and I've had to switch my mouse buttons, too... really frustrating for someone right handed!

I'll not be writing here until my wrist and arm feel better... I just can't bear the pain of it.


Speak to you all very soon :o)

Update

Well, so much has happened.

1) Angel-boy's face is almost healed. The visit to the vets went well, I was in and out within 15 minutes. The abscess was not very big at all (so glad I didn't wait) and there was virtually nothing in it, so it was easy to drain. The only evidence of it now is a small scab and a large area of shaved face (which is funny), though fortunately he didn't lose any whiskers.

2) My job isn't as bad as I though it was... we had a visit from an Ofsted woman today and although it wasn't the best, the situation is not so bad that we have to cease looking after kids (which I was worried about). There is so much to do now, and I'm hoping that the courses we are waiting to start will help to sort it out. I think our positive attitudes and the fact that we acknowledged that we did things wrong and are prepared to change... it went a long way admitting we made mistakes in the past and we are determined to change for the future. We still have to have an inspection sometime in the near future, but I'll try and worry about that later.

We don't have to go on an eight week course, now... just the four courses that we are missing. I felt better when I found out about that. The supervisor of the woman that came to see us agreed that it was insulting to make us attend the same courses as someone new to the job. Also, after reading the stuff she left for almost a solid week (in between actually looking for the kids, which I have to admit Mum has done more of than I have... I seem to handle the paperwork better and she better handle the kids, so it all works out well for us in the end, lol) I was able to talk to the Ofsted woman and not sound like a total idiot. I seem to read the stuff and then pass that knowledge along to Mum as she is not a great reader and I am an avid reader. I was even able to correct the woman about the main abuse catergories (she said five, I said four - and I was right, lol).


Anyway... I am gradually calming down now after seeming to have lived on a knife-edge for the past week. Hopefully I'll get a better night's sleep tonight... I tend not to worry as long as I know where I stand, plus, I have most of next week off, so I'll get a bit of holiday time (at worst I am working only two days, Wednesday and Friday, but hopefully the kids' Dad is trying to get the Friday off). Fingers crossed (also, without the kids here I can get out and get some outing risk assessments so that I can take them places once they come back, lol).

So much for the next day update, lol

I've not felt comfy in even opening this page in case it's seen by "other people".

Fortunately they are both gone until Sunday at the earliest. Their friends are getting married on Friday so they are staying nearer to the venue (Pingu is sort of second best man... he'll get none of the credit but the silly sod is doing all of the running around, getting the stuff sorted that the "real" best man will no doubt get the thanks for at the reception *sigh*). I've no idea just why it takes four days, but I'm not complaining. I think that Pingu is getting his new tattoo started on the Sunday, it will be going from his neck just by his ear right down his right arm to his elbow... I have no idea just how much it's costing, but he's already put down a £200 deposit and he's giving them another £100 on the day!... and something tells me that he'll be going back at least three more times (such a huge waste of money, but there we go... both of them always seem to find the cash for stuff like that, yet not for the bills they should be paying... madness *sigh*)

Anyway... I started work with more kids today. A brother and sister (he 2 1/2 and she 5), three days a week, Wed, Thu and Fri. It means I lose my half day off Wed and my day off on Fri (which is a shame as I'd got really used to them, lol), but it's money and the little boy (I'll call him by his initial, G) is infinitely better than I thought he would be... if anything it's his sister (C) that is a bit of a whinger, but it doesn't work with us (others have tried and failed in the past, hehe). They weren't meant to be here tomorrow as their Mum came in and said they were both going to their grans' house, but it turns out their gran bogged off down to her caravan so they will be here after all (that's the main reason the kids are with us, their Mum was always being let down when it came to family taking care of the kids... sometimes she even had to take time off work as there was no one to care for them as had been arranged beforehand! :( )

It's really nice having spare money again (I was paid this morning for this week, which was lovely). Just to go shopping and be able to buy something if I want to (even though there is now nothing that I want, so ironic, hehe). To not have to worry about either having gas and electricity or eating... to be able to pay our bills and not keep having to stall people with empty promises to pay them later - well, it makes all the difference in getting a good night's sleep!

I was woken up three times by Pingu last night! I was livid this morning... I never wake during the night, so if I'm woken I end up feeling as if I've not been to sleep. He woke me at 3am crashing about in the toilet... then his alarm was so loud it woke me at 4.30am... and then he woke me again when he left for work at just gone 5am. The first thing I did with my new wages was to go into my local chemist and buy £2's worth of earplugs! I've been looking at the garish hot-pink soft foam rubber things for weeks, but resisted the urge to get them. However, last night convinced me that it would be a sound investment, lol. Typical that I buy them and then the noise is gone as they are both away for four nights, hahaha! I have no doubt that they will be worth every penny when they return, though.

So loving the cooler weather at the moment... sadly it won't last, but it's so much nicer being able to sleep in a cool room instead of feeling as if you've just layed down in Satan's armpit!

So tired, so very, very tired...

... I will be updating this sometime tomorrow (when I can be assured of privacy, whenever that may be).

So much has happened in the last week and I need to use my written journal to remember it all. I seem to be able to write in that more easily than I can update here (and there is no way that I'm bringing that downstairs and alerting them to it's existance!). There's always the chance that this blog could be discovered by those that I don't wish to read it, so I have to update it when they are not around, and then close all tabs it is in, just in case they click it if I happen to walk away from the computer. Sissy and Pingu actually do that... read stuff over your shoulder, or lean over and read things whilst I'm sat here! I was stunned the first time Pingu did that! Their nosiness knows no bounds!

So now I make a habit of never leaving things I don't want them to read open in tabs - I don't want to have that "discussion"... easier all round to just close the things I wish to keep private. That's why I love my written diary... neither of them even know it exists, so I have more freedom to write without fear of discovery.

Finally...

... the road works outside the door should be gone by tomorrow. They are still on the road, further up the hill, so hopefully I should be able to park outside the house, which is just as well as Dad has a hospital appointment tomorrow at 1.30pm.

Did nothing all weekend, which was rather nice, if I'm honest, LOL!

Just watched The Vicar of Dibley, and I totally love that programme... I would love to be her... if I had my choice of alternate realities to live in, I'd be Geraldine Granger.

Manic Weekend update

We had people here all weekend, it was good, but also very tiring.

Normally there are three people in this house, and sometimes Josh (who we mind for a few hours on a Saturday). The weekend (just gone) we had nine people... Me, Mum, Dad, Sissy, Steffan (her boyfriend), Bradley (her brother), Josh (for a few hours) and Tony and Lynn (who are online friends are came down from Coventry and Glasgow, respectively, to see us).

Such a tiring time, and although it was great to see everyone, I felt like I needed another weekend to get over the busy weekend they were here for, LOL! I'm an anti-social person by nature, so to be around three people that I'd not go to know well (Steffan) or never even seen before (Tony and Lynn) was really difficult for me.

I'm glad they came here, though, just so that I had the chance to not run true to type (anti-social wise) for once.

I have such a headache now! Trying to get three kids of 8, 7 and 4 years old to just behave and stop arguing has robbed me of the last vestiges of my patience for the day! The 7 and 4 year old are brothers, and the 8 year old is a girl... they do not get on, and the 8 year old is leaving at the end of the week and the others delight in reminding her of the fact (she doesn't want to leave, which makes it worse). They totally rub each other the wrong way, and their total ability to ignore everything I say and carry on doing the things that end up costing them their snack privileges (and if they carry on end up with them sitting on our time-out step) makes me tired. I've never had kids fail to listen to me to the point where I could cheerfully scream in frustration before... it's completely new territory for me, and I don't like it at all. Maybe because I'm not used to being ignored, or maybe it's because we always used to take in babies (that grew up and went to school) so from an early age they knew us and our rules, so didn't push it once they knew they'd gone to far **shrugs**

A quick update...

... Joshie is doing well and out of the hospital. He has lost so much weight, though... a whole stone (12 pounds) in nine days!! He never had that much meat on him to start with so he looks really skinny now. He is eating and walking around, though, so he's on the mend. Thank you to all that kept him in your thoughts   (((hugs)))



Sissy is back again for the weekend. It was the scareist drive I have ever done... most of the motorways on the way down and back have no lights on them for huge long stretches, and I've never driven in the dark before. I love the person that invented cats' eyes, though, would love to give them hug as sometimes it was so dark that without them I'd have been in trouble... especially when the air got misty a few times :( Such a weird sensation to be in the dark, yet be dazzled by headlights from other cars at the same time. Mum got so nervous that in the end I was doing 50mph on the M25, so as you can imagine I was being overtaken all the time.. not that I cared, I was a bit nervous myself. I have a feeling that I'm going to be doing it all over again on Monday night to take her back... what joy, LOL!!!

Not all bad, though... I only took one wrong turn... I must be getting better with practice, hahaha!!!


I also don't think that I have a yeast intolerance after all... I've been eating bread all week (after having some toast, just to test it out) and I've had no adverse effects at all. So it can't be that and I have run out of ideas of what it can be  **sigh** The search for my digestive gremlin continues......