I feel very strange...

... I think I'm coming down with something, and I don't like it. My throat feels sort of scratchy and I always feel as if there is something stuck in my throat and I can't get rid of it. I also feel a bit achey, but I don't know if that's because I'm ill or because I moved a wardrobe yesterday.

I just don't feel 100%... I think I might have an early-ish night tonight and see if that helps.

Sometimes, Sissy drives me insane!! She was meant to not be going back to Brighton for about a month (she sorted it all out earlier this week, even getting an extension on her essay), but now she is going back tomorrow as her friend reminded her that they have tickets for some kind of show... so now she is going back tomorrow, staying tomorrow night/Thursday and then coming back early on Friday. So it looks like I'll be taking her tomorrow (no word on where the money for the diesel is coming from!!) and I'm not sure about Friday, but I know I cannot get her as I'm working (emergency babysitting).

I just wish she could make a decision and bloody stick to it! I love her dearly, but I have no desire to keep going backwards and forwards to Brighton all the damn time... the drive tires me intensely (and she always seems to go back in the dark, which I hate driving in as most of the journey is on motorways without lights and I always seem to get lost on the way back **sigh**)... that and she never thinks to pay for the fuel, and I can't keep affording the £15 per journey it takes to get her there and then get home again!

Off to take Sissy back to Brighton...

... during rush hour... in the dark! What joy! [/sarcasm]

Happy yet so very sleepy

I've have such a headache today... I've had it all day and no amount of painkillers has been able to shift it :(

It was probably all of the driving I did yesterday... five hours solid behind the wheel and most of it on roads that were dark (and I mean dark, no lights save for my own headlights)... plus on the way back from Brighton after dropping Sissy off I got lost, again! I ended coming home on the A24 which is a lovely road (dark, of course) but I really enjoyed driving it... I must see about finding it again in daylight, I think it would be a beautiful drive if I could actually see it, LOL!! At one point the road was almost a tunnel of trees, albeit skeletal branches now that the leaves have gone.

I must have a look in the map book and see if I can find the name of the village where we stopped and had a bite to eat, I would love to go back there again one day soon.


I'm really tired and I think that I'm going to head off to bed now (incredibly early night for me, usually I'm not in bed before 1am)... I am just having great trouble in keeping my eyes open, though.

A quick update...

... Joshie is doing well and out of the hospital. He has lost so much weight, though... a whole stone (12 pounds) in nine days!! He never had that much meat on him to start with so he looks really skinny now. He is eating and walking around, though, so he's on the mend. Thank you to all that kept him in your thoughts   (((hugs)))



Sissy is back again for the weekend. It was the scareist drive I have ever done... most of the motorways on the way down and back have no lights on them for huge long stretches, and I've never driven in the dark before. I love the person that invented cats' eyes, though, would love to give them hug as sometimes it was so dark that without them I'd have been in trouble... especially when the air got misty a few times :( Such a weird sensation to be in the dark, yet be dazzled by headlights from other cars at the same time. Mum got so nervous that in the end I was doing 50mph on the M25, so as you can imagine I was being overtaken all the time.. not that I cared, I was a bit nervous myself. I have a feeling that I'm going to be doing it all over again on Monday night to take her back... what joy, LOL!!!

Not all bad, though... I only took one wrong turn... I must be getting better with practice, hahaha!!!


I also don't think that I have a yeast intolerance after all... I've been eating bread all week (after having some toast, just to test it out) and I've had no adverse effects at all. So it can't be that and I have run out of ideas of what it can be  **sigh** The search for my digestive gremlin continues......

I am so tired!

Still, I suppose driving to Brighton and back in the pouring rain, then getting lost twice on the way back, might explain that... first time I took the wrong turn out of Brighton and ended up on the A27 down past Lancing (which is on the way to Portsmouth! nowhere near London, lol opposite direction in fact and the furthest south I've ever driven) and the second time I missed the turn off for the A2 and ended up almost crossing the Dartford Toll Tunnel (but managed to turn around in time!)

All told I must have driven about four straight hours (most of them in dreadful visability, with such bad spray it looked like fog!) and adding the "detours" to the total milage I must have done close to 200 miles!! Add to that a school run this afternoon, and also all of the kids being nightmares... two wouldn't do as they were told, one was just having a ball encouraging those two, and the other one started crying because she didn't want to watch Tom and Jerry, or even listen to it, when it was time for someone else to have their choice of programme on! (we have the tv watched in turns, one person watches what they like and all watch that, then it's someone else's turn... none of them like sharing anything, but that's just tough, if they don't share it, they don't watch any at all!!)


Anyway... I am now waiting for the huge rice pudding that I've put in the oven to turn out a total disaster to just put the cherry on the top of a fairly crap day, LOLOLOL!!!

What a tiring day yesterday was!!

I was driving for about 6 hours, and for someone that rarely does any distance over about 10 miles at a time, driving about 150 miles is quite a big thing!

We had to collect Sissy from her friends house in Clapham, then get from Clapham to Brighton, and then from Brighton back to London (I got lost three times, but not badly, missing turnings and having to double back, that kind of thing, hehe)... I ended up coming home the long way round as I missed the turn-off for the M25 (how, I've no idea, but I didn't even see a turn-off for it on the M23... stupid motorway!).

I was completely knackered when I got back home, then I got over-tired and got to bed at about 4am and slept like a log until 1pm (apparently I was dead to the world and refused to wake up, so Mum just left me there! Haha.)

I think that the only one that in anyway enjoyed the journey was the car! It charged the battery... well at one stage I was doing 80mph as I was just so desperate to be rid of Sissy... (she was in an appalling mood, mostly hangover induced, I think!) so it had better have charged the battery, LOL! Seeing as it was a bank holiday, and by the time we got to Brighton it was 6.45pm, nothing was open, so we didn't even get a stick of rock whilst we were there, nor any dinner. Somehow it felt wrong to go all that way and have nothing to show for it apart from a dead bum for sitting in the same position for so long! I didn't even manage to take any pictures (and for me that's bordering on sacrilige!).

I seem to be really getting into blogging/journal writing lately. Maybe it's because that it seems to relieve the boredom that I feel a fair amount of the time. Or maybe it's because I've finally found some kind of outlet for my frustrations and ideas. I feel that I can write about things in a blog that otherwise I'd just bottle up and leave to fester in my brain. Writing them down and getting them out into the open seems to make me a "lighter" person, mentally anyway. Sometimes I just ramble on and on about nothing very important (like now) but it really helps me... when my Dad was in the pysch unit the last time, the doctors there recommended that he keep a diary of his thoughts and feelings, he never did, as he's not a big reader or writer... he does so out of neccesity and not pleasure... both of my parents are the same (which makes me wonder just where my love of the written word came from? I can only assume that it jumped a generation from my maternal grandmother as she loved books as much as I do... thank you, Nana, rest in peace, love).

I also think that a lot of my journal entries come from the weird tangents that my brain takes when I start thinking about things properly. Sometimes I wonder just what the hell brought about some pages of writing, as the start of an entry often times has nothing in common with the end, LOL!! I have no idea, and to be honest, I don't much care. I just know that writing down all the crap helps me to deal with it... I just wish that I'd realised this years ago, the amount of problems that I could have chronicled and learnt from, and I didn't, makes me equally sad and angry!