Wow, that was some heavy rain we've just had!

So heavy in fact that it forced its way under our front door and needed lots of newspapers to mop it up! The sky turned an ominous charcoal grey and suddenly the sky opened and all of this water just appeared... even the cars on the motorway were forced to slow down (and seeing how mental a lot of the people that drive along it are, that's a miracle in itself, lol!)

It seems to have eased now, for which I'm glad... I don't think we'd have had enough old newspapers to have dealt with much more of it.

Mum got her new Blackberry today, so I'm having her old one... it's a lovely phone and I'm determined that Sissy is not going to destroy it, so I'm having it. I've got a small contract all set up, now all I need is for Mum to hand over her old one, LOL! I admit that I have missed the 8520 Curve BB that I had before xmas and I really missed being able to nip onto the net and look stuff up (normally I'd have to rely on this laptop and it's reaching closer and closer to reaching critical mass so having another option for keeping in touch with people is a nice back up in case this machine decides to give up the ghost completely when I least expect it).

Hopefully I'll also be able to better keep this site updated as I don't like doing so on my laptop, just in case "someone or other" starts poking their nose(s) in where they don't belong!

My cat has a massive lump on his face!!

Well,  maybe massive is a strong word, large swelling would be more accurate, lol.

Sissy noticed it at about 10pm last night. After talking to some people about it it seems to be an abscess of some kind, so I have to take him to the vets. Never had a cat have something like this before... I just hope I can find the right letter so that we can take him to the PDSA... I hate to think how much a private vet would cost *eek*

He doesn't seem too bothered... he's fast asleep on my bed... typical Angel-boy!

***edited to add at 15.10: I have an appointment at our local private vets at 4.30pm today... the PDSA couldn't see him until Monday, and as the time for it was 3.15, and Mum would have had to go to fill in the paperwork I couldn't have taken her by car as the kids are still here then. That means having to get a bus, in the middle of the summer holidays, to a fairly rough place, with a scared cat in a pet carrier... I don't think so! His treatment could cost up to £100... but it's worth it to get the infection sorted rather than leave it growing for two more days. I'll just not have any spending money this month... he's worth every penny, though - I love that little guy***

It's pouring with rain here, and it's calming me down nicely - thank you Mother Nature. I needed calming after Sissy going off on one again this morning regarding my attitude to my work (and its more complex nature now). Fortunately we don't have to do that full eight day course starting in November... but we do have to do four modules over four Saturdays starting at the end of September instead! Oh well... I suppose it's better to get it our of the way. I am dreading it, though.

Sissy tried to goad me into an argument, but I wouldn't be goaded and in the finish I ignored her completely, saying that the reason I was not speaking to her was because she had made me angry and rather than say nasty hurtful things to her I was choosing to not say anything at all! She hated that, but in the end she apologised to me (I never to her... after all, she started it by giving out her opinion when I didn't ask for it!!) She said I was being childish in ignoring her, until I explained that I was actually being an adult and not lashing out her just because I could. She shut up then... even then I still had to retreat into my room for about 30 minutes and put some earplugs in, just so that I could have some peace and quiet and restore my sense of calm.

It's pouring with rain here... and more ramblings.

... and I'm sure I just heard a low rumble of thunder somewhere close by.

I so love the rain... the sound always calms me right down and makes me sleepy.


I now have another topic that I cannot raise around Sissy... abortion (to add to religion of any kind, her parents, asylum seekers, etc). I believe that is the woman's right to choose (even if it disagrees with the fathers choice) as it's her body... she disagrees as the potential baby is only 50% hers. I can see her point, but I still feel the woman should get to decide. I also don't think life beginning at conception, either... if the foetus couldn't survive outside the womb, then to me it's not yet a baby. Fairly controversial thinking maybe, but it's how I see it.

I was told off for using generalisations in my replies... apparently it's wrong to use them in a general conversation **sigh**

I wonder why I let myself get so wound up over things that are never going to affect me personally? I'm never having kids, so abortion is a non-issue for me. Other people's choices are their business and it's nothing to do with me, in any way... but I got so heated that my face flushed bright red (a bad sign, as it means I'm getting either angry or my latent anxiety is close to breaking forth!)

Sissy was hammering on and on, and eventually her voice just really started to grate on my ears, not to mention my nerves... she was getting more and more shrill with each word she said. I could feel myself start to "zone out" again - just like last time, and I was glad when the topic changed to something else and I was able to be quiet and not participate in the conversation anymore.

I don't know... I just find myself to be in a state of such mental confusion lately. Some of the things I've always believed seem to be sloughing away, yet I still try and keep hold of them, vice-like, as I am loathe to just let them go. Surely it's a bad thing to do? I wish I knew.

Yay... more rain

I hope it rains hard enough to water my containers... I'm still not feeling energetic enough to drag the hose and watering cans round the place, lol!

My cold is finally going away... it's taken nearly three days in bed, copious amounts of painkillers, a bottle of Sinex nasal spray and a whole box of tissues, mind, but at least I'm starting to feel better.

Am watching the news and there is tennis being played at Queen's Club... so that means that Wimbledon is shortly here... yay!! I adore watching Wimbledon... best two weeks of the year, and it usually means that there is lots of lovely rain and I don't have to water the garden myself, hehe! Me, cynical? Never! LOL.

That is such a beautiful noise...

... the sound of rain hammering down on the gazebo roof just under my bedroom window... doesn't make me feel any less crappy, but it's a lovely sound all the same! Hehe. So glad I didn't water the garden earlier, not that I had the energy to do it, but the thought was there. You can't beat a good drop of rain.

This cold is really starting to make me feel like the grumpiest person on the planet now... all I hear myself saying is how nasty I feel. I must stop it, I'm starting to annoy myself now. The thing that is annoying me the most is the sneezing... not little ones either, but huge, hurt your chest, have you wetting yourself and making you feel as if you're going to blow the top of your head off ones... the ones that give you an instant headache *sigh*

The arm on my glasses broke off earlier today! Filled me with terror that did, my eyesight is putting it bluntly, utter shit and without my glasses I can barely see anything (to give an example, take a piece of glass, smear it with vaseline and try and look through it... that is how bad my eyesight is without glasses!). I only have the one pair of specs and I cannot afford to get any new ones just right now. Fortunately Mum dashed to our corner shop and brought a tube of the strongest super glue they had, and it seems to have persuaded the little piece of metal holding the arm in place to stay put... for now. I have to be very careful with my glasses now, and the left arm is fused in place, but I can see and I didn't have to resort to the old "sticking plaster repair", so it's all good, lol! I really have to get some new glasses soon, though, especially as I don't know just how long the repair will last... I suppose I shouldn't really complain, I have had this pair of glasses for going on eight years! LOL.

Who was the bright spark that thought it would be a good idea to put onions into salmon paste?! I can assure them that if I ever find out who it was I shall do them a grave injury!

Anyway, I suppose I really should try and get some sleep... last night was a disaster, sleep-wise... I went to bed at 9.40 pm, I was woken up every hour by noisy people (Sissy and Pingu) going to the bloody toilet (which is next to my bedroom) and then the noisy cow next door starting doing something in her kitchen (which shares a wall with my bedroom) which woke me up completely at 1.07am, and she kept my awake until gone 4am! If it keeps on I'm going to have words with her, selfish cow, I can't handle the double onslaught of noise! I can handle either noise here or in there, but not both at once. I have been forced to listen to my MP3 player, just to try and block it all out... don't get me wrong, I adore Siouxsie and the Banshees (the album that is currently the first one that plays when I turn it on), but sometimes all I want is peace and quiet!! Is that too much to ask for in the early hours of the morning?!?!

I've just had a damn fly buzz me in the right ear!! Freaked me the hell out and now I'm not going to be able to sleep until it's either gone away or dead... bring on the Raid!

All told this has been a day that I am going to try and quickly forget... it sucked... BIG TIME!!

It's raining here... again

It seems to have done nothing but rain here all day. Apart from a brief flash of sunshine earlier (and I do mean brief) all it's done is be gloomy and rain. I don't mind really... rain always seems to calm me down and chill me out (not that I need much of either lately... feeling ill is sapping all of my strength anyway, lol!)

Now she's not going back...

... she's staying on for the month that was originally talked about. I swear, one of these days I'm going to do her some real harm!! LOL.

Her friend was pissed off about her not going back, but tough luck! Sissy couldn't afford to get the train, I couldn't afford to put fuel in the car, and her boyfriend (I'll call him Pingu from now on, it's a work nickname because he has a way of waddling when he walks as his hip operation left him with one leg one inch shorter than the other) couldn't take her because he's working, so everything conspired to keep her here... she doesn't seem too upset about it, and is looking forward to her new bed turning up tomorrow and also seeing a little girl we used to care for (that she adores) on Friday.

I'm sat here listening to the rain that is pouring down outside... it hasn't rained heavily here for ages, and it sounds really lovely... I've always loved just listening to the rain, it can sometimes make me really sleepy as it's such a comforting noise to me.

I feel so weak today...

... even typing this is a major effort. The muscles in my arms feel so weak and even holding a pen is a test of strength. I do hope it passes soon )whatever it is **sigh**)


It's pouring with rain here... for once I'm really glad it's raining. My car is a mess, covered with all of the dust from the road works outside. I only washed it on Sunday, but it looks like I didn't bother... hopefully the rain will wash all of the dust away from both the car and the road (the road looks weird being a dusty beige colour and it also makes the parking bay markings very hard to see... and the garden could really do with a nice drink, too). I love the sound of the rain, calms me and makes me feel sleepy - not so good in the latter respect (like I need help lately in feeling sleepy, hehe).